Jonathan Schoenberg is 5 feet, 9 inches tall, which is the average height for an American male. Some scientists have asserted that the average height is 5 feet, 10 inches, but he believes it is 5 feet, 9 inches. He is the executive creative director and partner at TDA Boulder. He talks about his kids and dogs a lot. He has only one kidney, but if you meet him, treat him just like normal people who have two kidneys. He writes his own bios but wants you to think someone else is writing them so he seems important. It only makes you understand how profoundly insecure he is, and that no matter how many bloated achievements he includes in a bio, he has profound self-doubt and just wants a hug. He does not want a hug from strangers, but if you know him, please hug him, because even though he has issues with intimacy, he really just wants to be loved.